What Goes Around ...


It's not a good nor a Christian-like thing to revel on other people's misfortune but as they say "Karma is a bitch" and one can't help but chuckle when someone who does wrong you gets his/her comeuppance.

A while ago a friend betrayed me in the most hurtful of ways. I was doing a shoot for a showreel and invited my friend to come and help me with the shoot. I later found out from the guys that I was shooting with that during the shoot my friend was saying some nasty things about me and telling the crew that I looked "fat" on camera among other things. 

That hurt me deeply as this person was supposed to be my friend and if he had some criticism about my work he could have just told me himself instead of trashing me in front of the people I work with behind my back. I never did confront him about it but learned a good lesson from that about friends and competition.

My thing has always been that, I live my life and work on my career at my own pace. I try as much as I can not to compare myself nor compare the rate of my success with that of other individuals as we all have different paths in life and would never achieve our goals at the same pace. That has actually saved me from a lot of things. 

I am more focused on building my career and name before I can be considered a celeb. I believe that building a body of work before you get tagged with the celebrity name is the safety net that will ensure you some longevity in this industry. 

If people like you for your work instead of the fact that all of the sudden you are everywhere, you will be able to sustain yourself even when the media attention on you fades because you would have had the sensibility to build a foundation before the fame.

With that, I have managed to keep my work separate from the friendships I develop within the industry. Most of the friends that I have made in this industry are not the kind of friends that I hang out with. 

However when I need some advice or favours I know I can call them and they would help with the information I need. That way I know that our friendship is not based on the frivolous-ness of this fickle industry where people only greet you when there is a camera around but would act like they don't know you when you meet them in a mall. 

I have been blessed to have met some individuals who in the eyes of the industry are known as celebrities but in my life are people that I hold very dear for the contribution they have made in my career and its future.

Just recently my faith in people within this industry was shook again when someone I had trusted somewhat betrayed me to by sidelining me and eventually costing my my job. Though the said individual never said anything bad about me (that I know of), their actions sabotaged me. 

If you are in a team with someone and you do not give them the credit they deserve when you putting a report of your work together, you are indirectly making them look bad thus making the boss think that person is not doing his job and you are the only person worth acknowledging. 

I was so hurt when that happened. Needless to say, I moved on and still hold no grdges but that does not mean I have forgotten about it. From that too, a big lesson was learned. You never put other people's feelings ahead of your work especially when doing so could make you look bad and eventually cost you your job.

Yesterday, I learned that someone who hurt me very badly has fallen to rock bottom. Naturally, I found myself happy that they had gotten what was coming to them. I believe that if you build your career on hurting and sabotaging other people, at some point people will see through you. 

If your claim to fame is by stealing other people's work and taking all the credit for it, in the long run you will get caught as the creativity that you display in your career is not yours so conjuring it on other projects may not happen. 

The other thing about stealing people's ideas is that you can only steal what's on paper but taking it beyond that may not work as you do not know the full vision of the person who came up with the idea.Needless to say, the said person stole my concept and now he doesn't know what to do with it and has subsequently had to abandon the concept. 

Upon hearing that he hasn't been doing well and his career has all but fell down the drain I couldn't help but feel a bit vindicated as when I told some of our other friends that the concept he was doing wa actually something that we came up with they probably didn't believe me. Of course now I feel bad because no matter how people hurt us, if we love them there will always be that part of you that feels sorry for them.

The moral of the story here is that, be cautious about the type of people you consider as friends in this industry. I have said this many a times before, friends should never compete with each other. The notion that you can have a "healthy" competition with your friend is an oxymoronic idea. Inevitably, one of you will hurt the other. 

The best thing is for you to celebrate each other successes independent of your own ambitions. If you are both actors for instance, rather encourage each other on each's strong suits rather than try and compare yourselves to each other. I have "friends" that are presenters on TV. 

I am very new at this presenting thing so instead of me trying to compare myself to them, I try and do my own thing the best way I know how and try and learn as much as I can from them without trying to mirror my thing to theirs.

I know I am not ready for TV presenting yet. I am still more comfortable doing my own thing with online presenting because I have more freedom to do my own thing and find my niche in this whole presenting. 

Should I make the leap to full time TV presenting i hope that the experience that I am getting from Zoopy and what I got from Fancam will enable me to bring some fresh approach to whatever it is that I will be doing then. Right now I am my own competition. 

I am also blessed to have the kind of fans that are more like my friends even though I have never met then. With that I am able to get direct honest feedback from them on what I am doing and how I can improve on it. There is no greater blessing than that for me. Yes having people know your name and gracing the covers of magazines would be great but I still love that I know most of my fans by name. 

See you on Facebook :)

PS: If you reading this (YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE), I am sorry that things aren't going well for you but I hope this teaches you to be a better person and realise that you can't live your life on hurting other people and get away with it forever. 

I had to share this for myself and not to make you feel bad. For some time now I resented you for what you did to me but as much as your situation now made me feel avenged, I hope you can bounce back because you are talented and our friendship wasn't all bad. We had some awesome times too.

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