Breaking The Stereotype Of A Black Gay Man

I remember reading a story online earlier this year of the gay black fathers who caused outrage on the internet with their “typical family morning.” A chore that any happy family does each morning turned into a tirade of hatred and scorn towards Kordale and Kaleb. Why? Because they happened to be a gay couple with kids ... and BLACK. With the recent nonsense around Thabiso Mmethi's episode of My Perfect Wedding and the homophobia that reeked in the stereotyping of a gay men, I am on a mission to break the stereotype of what gay is and looks like. 

Kordale and Kaleb, a gay black couple, began posting photos of their beautiful family on Instagram, but when their honest depiction of a new modern family went viral, it exposed the homophobia and racism that still lurks in the a lot of people. Sadly most of the negative comments came from black people.

Just as Thabiso's wedding and his eccentric  behaviour earned him a gay label and prejudice even from some gays who accused him of fronting, the photo above showing Kordale and Kaleb’s morning routine with their two daughters with tags such as #proudfathers, #blackfathers and #gaydads, should have been a positive thing to show a different side to fatherhood and the family unit, but it was turned into some inqusition on fatherhood and being gay.

As Mused Magazine Online reported at the time, most of the positive responses to the photo were still even laced with cruelty, as many users were glad to see “two things: 

1. The fact that this was a black gay couple 

2. That it was nice to see black men taking care of children.”

“Are we sheltered from black gay couples that the general public doesn’t think they exist?”, wrote Mused‘s Beyond Steven. 

“The point is that Kaleb and Kordell are not unicorns. They are one of many.”

Look, I am not gonna go on some crusade and say every non effeminate gay black man out there should sit on some pedestal and proclaim their sexuality, all I am going to say though is that the perception that all gay men are like Somizi ought to change. 

Ideally having other gay celebrities in this industry come out would aide the this but I am all for personal journeys and would not demand on anyone to betray their privacy to appease a judgmental society. 

For guys like Kordel and Kaleb, who choose to make their private lives public to change perceptions, I salute them., even if they are American. Here are typical black guys, in love and raising two beautiful girls.

This is the new normal.