Open Relationships VS Threesomes

Someone asked me the other day ... if I had to chose between having an open relationship and a threesome, which would I be comfortable with. I have never had to face that predicament in my life as yet, so my views on this and my response to him solely rely on hypothetical. Thought I would share those views with you guys and see what yours would be.  

We all want to have a great relationship but some of us just don’t know how to keep one. When we think we have figured out how to keep one, we face challenges like it being stale after a while. It is not easy to focus all your attention, desires and expectations on just one person for long period of time. Let's be real.


It is common knowledge that; unless the couple works at keeping thing fresh in a relationship, there inevitability of the relationship getting boring is unavoidable. Often, instead of just infusing more activities in our relationships outside the bedroom, we tend to focus all the attention in fixing every problem we have in the bedroom even when our problems aren't there. 

One such, is that whenever we think a relationship has gotten stale, we want to look outside the relationship for a remedy. Some cheat, but those who are comfortable enough in their relationship to be honest and open, choices such as having an open relationship or having a threesome become alternatives. 

Now, how do I feel about having open relationship and threesomes?


Open Relationships: A relationship in which two people agree that they want to be together, but can't exactly promise that they won't see other people too. Basically, to have it all: a significant other and the freedom to hook up with other people.

While we may want to live interesting and experimental lives, the biggest mistake any couple can make is having an open one. Don't roll your eyes yet ...

You would assume that what you have is enough to make it work, but when you feel like you need more than what you have, it borders problems. Engaging in an open relationship, you and your partner risk in love with someone else, having chemistry he might prefer over yours, or risk putting the whole relationship out to dry. 

Then there is the issue of trust and health risks. As much as you may love your partner and trust them implicitly, you have no guarantee that when they are out hooking up with other people, they are being safe. Just because someone says they use protection, it does not mean they actually do. Without you being there you are actually living your life in blind faith and that can be extremely dangerous. 

Threesomes; A situation where a group of three people join together for sexual pleasure. This is a couple inviting a third party for sex

A threesome for me would be more palatable. Atleast in a threesome, you know what your partner is doing and with whom. You are part of the experience and have control over what does or doesn't happen  



I genuinely believe that when we put restrictions on sex that is when we create an environment where people are dishonest, thus causing the surge of sexually transmitted diseases and pandemics. People have sex. Someone had to have sex for you to be in this planet and read this.

I strongly believe in monogamy, I am also open to the idea that some relationships may need more than therapy to survive. Sex is a big part of a relationship so if the love is there but the passion has waned then perhaps it is time to look for other alternatives to keep the relationship strong. 

While, if I was in a position where I would have to choose, I would choose a threesome, sometimes when a relationship doesn’t work its time to move on.

Don’t recycle something you’re not going to use again and use OPEN as an excuse or invite more drama in a situation you should have walked away from by inviting a third person into your personal intimate space. 

Once again this is just ... One Guy's Opinion. 

What's your thoughts, Open relationship or Threesome — if you had to choose between the two?

Let's chat. I'm on Twitter: @philmphela and Facebook: Phil Mphela


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